i just wanted to share about how i get around the time i pick up a chip. ive been doing a lot of reflecting lately about where i came from. i know that some people disagree, but i think that it is a crutial part of my program. it reminds me of where i was and where i could be in a heartbeat if i decide to ever go back. i dont ever want to feel the way i did 18 months ago when i wanted to die and actually tried to a few times. i dont ever want to feel so alone and hopeless and phisically and mentally sick ever again!!! i have reflected like this a few times in the last 18 months and sometimes it almost doesnt seem real. i cant believe the life i have today through the 12 step programs and places like this. so much has happened,all of which were for the better. it has been different at times, but i have been able to things that i thought were only possible if i have a bunch of pills down my throat, or grams up my nose, or black tar in my lungs…. everything is better… relationships, i actually have a job now, i was able to be an example for my mom and she is now picking up 60 days the same day im getting 18 months!!!
for anyone that is newer than i am, without this place and being clean and SOBER, i am a trashcan fiend that cant stop himself, so if i can do this, anyone can… thanks to everyone here for everything!!