Hi everyone, I’ve been reading this forum for a long time and have tried to quit drinking many times. In fact I’ve been on a 2 week binge as of right now and tried to quit 14 times during that time. This is the most hideous addiction anybody can imagine. I have never felt so much shame, embarressment,. etc…I feel completely powerless. Yet, my willingness to quit has gotten very strong. Today I will not drink. Mpr(sorry, I hope I got that right) you are my inspiration right now. I’m trying to do this without AA or any outside help, except my anti-depressant, and valium at the moment. I have asked my dr for help, yet continued to drink. I went as long as 10 days without a drink, felt better then I had in years, yet that urge took over one day and I was back at the bottom of the bottle. I started drinking in January 2006, I’m in my 40’s. I’m absolutely disgusted at how I destroyed my once fit body, and I can’t even imagine what I did to the inside. I’m ready, I’m done drinking, and I plan to use this forum to help me. I enjoy hearing other’s stories and feeling like I’m not alone. So, hello again to you all, I’m happy to be here.