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    It is hard reading back my last post, when it is in written form it looks so much more ugly than it seems when I am in the moment. My wife was obviously none too pleased when I started heading down the wrong path again and she was happy when I got back on the right one. She always asks me to read my posts when she sees me typing here and I usually will read them to her if she asks. This time I told her that it was painful and I didn’t want to read it to her but she could come here and read it by herself if she wanted to. She respected my pain and she hasn’t read it. If I write an uplifting post I will sometimes mail the link to friends or family close to me that know of my difficulties. The last one I have not and won’t.

    What posting in such honesty does do though is give me strength to stay on the right path this time. Remind myself each time how horrible some of those mornings were and how I never want to feel like that again. The constant obsession that begins to eat away at me when I am deep in the middle of alcoholic days.

    I feel back 100% today and have a whole day ahead of me. It is time to get back to the confidant sober stride I enjoyed for so many months. But to never ever forget the pain of the wrong path and why I must try my hardest to stay from ever going there again.

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