Search for Addiction Treatment Centers Near You Forums Alcohol Abuse I have been lurking here for months

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    Hi all,

    I have been quietly reading here for months. I have been drinking relatively heavy for 2 -3 years with periods of sobriety on and off since I was 16. I drink a fair bit of beer equivalent to a 6 pack to a 12 pack a day depending on strength of the beer. I have had plenty of negative consequences but have so far avoided any law or job consequences.

    I know I want to quit drinking. I recently had minor surgery today, which required me to be off booze for 4 days before the operation. I complied and didn’t have to many adverse effects except for the hangover I had on day one. I had to “stock up” before quitting. Well suffice to say I waited 12 hours before I grabbed my first beer.

    I am ashamed and feel like I need to “talk” to someone. My wife and family don’t fully realize what I am going through. I am a closet drinker and prefer to drink at the house so no one can judge me. I don’t know what I expect from this site and all of you. I am sad and slowly isloating myself from my friends and extended family. I am not religous and cannot see myself attending AA (not that it is a religous entity). I did in my 20s and it was not for me. When I quit I pour myself into work and become a work-aholic. Trading one for another I suppose.

    I have lost all interest in things that I used to do for fun and relaxation. Alcohol is my only “hobby”. I know that I self medicate for anxiety and depression but do not dare tell my GP as I am sure he will take me off my medication for anxiety which is klonopin (sp?). It’s the only thing that keeps me somewhat level.

    Anyways. I wanted to share this in hopes that I can change me behavior through admitting my problem in a safe forum to start.

    Thanks to everyone. I have found this site to be very inspirational.

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