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  • #41001

    I’ve made 100 excuses…….I was in total denial. IT’s 940pm and I went to buy whisky …….I just can’t stop. I got a black eye the other night from running into a wall. Thankfully a guy friend was with my and took care of me but I just can’t keep living this lie.
    I feel it’s shameful to go to AA. Does anyone else agree? Like……a failure. I don’t want it to go public.
    Then the other day my therapist gave me Klonopin b/c of my anxiety….and I overdose of those. That’s all I know how to do. Overdose.

    I’m sick of wasting my life. I”m 26/f. I sit home every day. I play bass and am trying to get a band going and all I can think about is when will I get my next fix.

    Red wine was my drug of choice. Then it went from straight scotch, long island ice tea, rum and coke, jack daniels-and it won’t make me feel sick. I got such a high tolerance from it.

    Please someone tell me…… does this hell end?
    I tried on my own last week to withdraw myself. I couldn’t even last 2 days! I was sick. nausea, pain, sweaty……… I couldn’t take the feeling anymore so I just ran to take the mouthwash, vanilla extract-anything.
    just……..don’t want to die. ANd i take pills too. you know……I don’t even know what I take.
    I hate my life. I do not knwo how it ended up this way………

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