I have a disc in my lower back that is nearly flat. The neurosurgeon said surgery would be a 50/50 deal so I opted out of it.

I was moving stuff around my house last night and my back went out. It took me at least 5 minutes to get from my bedroom to the bathroom. My legs felt like they were going to buckle.

I have a dr’s appt today for another reason but I am scared that I might get pills for my back. If I take pills then it’s on…..my history is that I will then do it all…..any drug I can get my hands on and of course alcohol.

WHAT do we do in situations like this? My body is shaking and I don’t know if it’s due to fear or excitement…..

I was on the second level of my house and there was no way I could get up or down stairs…..I thought about calling 911 cuz I felt so stuck – couldn’t move up, down, forward, back…nothing.

Today it feels better, but the idea of drugs is in my head and it scares me.