Search for Addiction Treatment Centers Near You Forums Alcohol Abuse indulging in a little self pity

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    Hi everyone. Am in the UK and have been awake most of the night. Spent the day with family yesterday and could hardly function by the end of the day – did not drink but was so tempted. My father sexually abused me up until I was 15 (only finished because he died) and my mother goes on and on about what a great dad and husband he was (my sister also engages in this). My husband knows about my childhood but his family do not – they just see me getting more and more withdrawn and snappy – oh how I wish I could just shout “he was an evil b*****d” – I can’t – my mother is in her 80s and I have no idea if she really knew (I am terrified that she did and did nothing). I am crying as I write this – the pain is almost unbearable, drink made it bearable but I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY. I used to think that I could not face these problems without a drink – I know that I can but I also know that it is going to be a long difficult road and just right now I am indulging in a little self pity.

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