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- September 1, 2015 at 2:40 pm#37291AnonymousInactive
Just yesterday I posted on another thread on 12 Step National Meetings about how it seems XABF seems to be doing really well. He lost his job about nine months before we met (drinking on the job due to the split with his ex a month before). All through our relationship he said he never felt good enough for me yet he loved me and was in love with me. He even maintained he loved me and was in love with me on the day he broke up with me.
Just last week I discovered he’s working again – since about two months after our split. I know I shouldn’t have done this, but I looked in his bank account today (we set it up online together while still a couple) and he has taken home three payments since Friday – totalling almost £2,000. Bearing in mind this is after tax, he must be on at least £30,000 a year. Having not worked in four years? He is a labourer and has had all sorts of jobs in the past. I didn’t think labourers were paid this much though. My friend thinks it may be something dodgy, else why would he be paid three lump sums in his account in two working days.
All throughout our two years he said he never felt good enough for me. I said, nonsense, why do you think I’m still with you? Because I see you’ve got it in you to fight this. You’ve got more about you than other alcoholics. You just need to find your way back.
Stuck by him for three years – enabled him to the tune of thousands of pounds in that time – keeping a roof over his head when he was street homeless, buying him food, clothes, etc. He turns it round three months after we split and is now earning absolutely loads of money.
I don’t resent him pulling back from the mess he was in. But how come he seemed to be able to do it two months into a relationship with this new girl when he couldn’t do it for a woman he claimed he loved and was in love with for three years, and who gave him everything, physically, emotionally and mentally, and encourage him saying she knew he was better than the way he was acting.
On the day we broke up he did say I’d get every penny back. I regret it now but I laughed at that! I’ve not heard anything since. But if he’s sorted himself out, do you think he’s likely to remember how I helped him? I paid for hotels for him when he was on the streets, gave him a deposit to move into the house he lived in until recently.
Now I owe £11,000 – (Not all down to him but probably half of it is!)
I wish I’d never met him.
Also I’ve received two calls from unknown numbers. The first was at 12.30 on Saturday night. The second was today. I picked today’s call up and said hello about three times but the caller hung up. Now I’m paranoid it’s him as this has never happened before – specially after what happened on Saturday night. Both calls came through on my second phone – not a lot of people have that number. I always give my other number out.
So confused. Wish I’d never met him.:headbange
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