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    ya.. wedding reception last night. had five drinks which is a ton for me. im a tiny girl & i dont have much tolerance, but what is weird to me is i didnt even really feel drunk until the end of the night. i had a cigarette & all of a sudden it just hit me. i realize more than ever that i still just dont have what it takes to even be around alcohol. cant say no to it i guess. i feel so ashamed & guilty & i regret it so much. im really mad at myself. i feel like shhhh!t right now in so many ways. i hate that drinking is a problem for me &that it interferes with my life like that. i wanted to be there with family & friends. i should have just went home & i guess thats what i have to do from now on. just stay away if alcohol is involved. its sad to me.
    sorry im knd of just rambling. i dont know what to do now…….
    i hope this is my first & last post like this

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