- This topic has 0 replies, 1 voice, and was last updated 11 years, 8 months ago by Anonymous.
- September 15, 2008 at 1:17 pm#34167AnonymousInactive
its been a long night, so i figured i would take the time write out my story so far and hope that it can help me find people who share similar experiences and can talk with me regarding addiction and recovery.
i started abusing prescription meds when i was 12, just as a way of coping with life. shortly after that came marijuana and alcohol. i got into the “party lifestyle”, with the appeal being a more available supply of drugs and the ability to get connected with more people who could introduce me to new chemicals. from there, it was all downhill. i spent my 8th grade year immersed in the drug culture, and by the time i was 15 i had tried just about every drug there was and developed an addiction to heroin. like any other drug i experimented with, i told myself that this was “just a recreational thing” and swore that i would never get hooked.
heroin became the only thing i cared about. a drug-buddy of mine helped me meet older women who were willing to pay me for sex so that i could support my habit, and of course this only helped to perpetuate my drug use. my addiction got worse, and my life became more miserable than i could ever imagine. still, i kept using. even after losing someone very dear to me to a heroin overdose, i kept telling myself that i could stop anytime and there was no need to give up the life i had become so comfortable with just yet. finally, when i was 16 my parents sent me to a rehab where i spent the next 16 months of my life. when i came home in october, i truly believed that i had changed. i was set on living a clean life, free of ALL chemicals. i started going to NA meetings, getting connected with positive people, and laying my old life to rest.
but it didnt take long for my past to catch up with me. i started slacking on my meetings, hanging around the places i used to frequent, and associating with people who used. i quickly regressed back to my old habits. a few months later i moved out of my parents house, got an apartment with some friends, and picked up where i had left off just years ago. this continued for about 6 months, until my use of drugs caused me to lose my apartment, my family’s respect, many true friends, and a pretty good job. i was in debt and homeless, so i threw my pride away and went to my parents for help. they allowed me to move back in with them if i made a commitment to stop using drugs. i told them i would, and thats where i am today. i am attending meetings again and trying to stay involved with people who will influence me positively and support my recovery.
so far, i’ve made it a month and godwilling, there will be many more to follow. please keep me in your prayers, as i struggle with temptation daily. if anyone has had similar experiences, i would really like to talk. thanks.
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