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    This has been my very being since my earliest memories. I always felt things physically and emotionally in a very powerful way. At times I am grateful for this attribute, but many other times I curse it. It has helped me and it has hindered me. Tonight I can’t help but remember just how much this aspect of my life has influenced me both good and bad.

    When I was very young I didn’t like to wear socks because the prolonged sensation of having them on my feet bothered me. Oppositely since childhood I have also always been a very sexual person, and felt an intense desire to fulfill sexual urges at an early age, long before puberty. Finally, as puberty set on I became emotionally raw and was extremely sensitive to criticism, conflict, and challenge.

    As the years went by I matured but somehow today I still feel as though I have a deficit of some kind of “adult maturity”. I still feel overly sensitive and for the most part I have grown to accept it and actually appreciate it. The problem is that I wonder if I had not had this overly sensitive affliction both physically and emotionally, would my substance abuse issues not have been as dire or even existed at all?

    Just pondering and venting a bit.

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