I really need some hope…some courage. I feel like i am closterphobic with the idea i am going to be like this forever. I can’t quit oxy. Please..somone tel me they quit and are doing ok. Tell me they are living life. I know all addictions are serious, but please tell me you quit and made it through and were taking a lot of oxy. I have been taking about 10 30mg roxicodones a day on and off. I’ve been in an extremely half assed recovery for a while. I take subutex then I end up using for 2-4 days and starting it all over. I just feel like i’ve relapsed so man ytimes i feel like that is all that is around me. You see the same kids goin back to pills, becuase noone can quit! I still smoke weed and feel like..well scared to have nothing. like ill melt. now i started messing with h for the past few days…its just horrible. I don’t want to need somethig nanymore. I dont want to be completely broken mentallyy phsyically and financially

Someone please tell me you quit and you were taking 300mg a day or more..tell me its possible PLEASE.

And to make matters worse, my doc just supplies basically unlimited subutex. I missed my last appointment this monday…because i spent th emoney on using. But i am thinking its a goo dthing. I have 29 8mg subutex. I want to do a 1-1.5mo detox and be done with it. I feel like if i have subutex ill keep going back and forth forever.

Everytime I try I fail. i have no will power 🙁 I know about NA. and the sad thing is I know it works. I dont kno why I cant get my self to start goin gagain.