Search for Addiction Treatment Centers Near You Forums Substance Abuse Try to Come Up With My Own Recovery Program

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  • #31126
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I have a couple of questions and then please let me know what you think. My Recovery Plan:

    First, Monday night I will continue with the 12 Step Program; I’ll go to one AA or NA meeting a week, Thursday I’ll continue to go to celebrate recovery and stay for the small group afterwards.

    Now, this is the biggee. What if I ask my family to give me random drug testing?

    First….i don’t know how to stop and this, to me, seems like it may force me to stop.

    Second…..can you tell me where to find such kits and the cost (i know i could call the drug store, but i’d rather get my info from you guys)

    Will there be a kit that just test for alcohol and cocaine?

    Since i’ve used recently, i’d like to start off clean, so how long does it take for cocaine and alcohol to get out of my system?

    Okay….this is the part that troubles me: Oh God……this leave no room for relapse. I could relapse but it would certainly be out in the open and not hidden due to the testing. Which means…..if i was to fail the test……i don’t know what would happen to me.

    I keep hearing relapse is part of recovery, but it really can’t be with me and this drug testing is holding my feet to the fire.

    So…..will you guy answer all the above questions and give me your input?

    Thanks.

    #164586
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I don’t know if there is a single product that tests both alcohol and drugs. I have ordered drug tests over the internet. The ones I ordered were pretty expensive about $9.00 each, but they are supposed to test for 4 drugs and are supposed to be very convenient for the person doing the testing. My daughter is still in rehab but I wanted to have them on hand for when she comes home. I think that it will help her not to use if she knows that she will be tested.

    #164590
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    @Movin On 1504352 wrote:

    I have a couple of questions and then please let me know what you think. My Recovery Plan:


    I think if it works for you, it is a great plan. If you are finding that it’s working as you are going along, great, if not add more to it, as time goes on you can always let some of it go if you so shall choose. I have my own recovery plan, and it changed a lot in the beginning. I didn’t do NA, but when I needed to I did CMA and I added extra therapy sessions, came here more often, whatever I needed to do. As time went on things changed, but if I needed to tonight, I would add anything back to it.
    What feels right for you, go with it.

    First, Monday night I will continue with the 12 Step Program; I’ll go to one AA or NA meeting a week, Thursday I’ll continue to go to celebrate recovery and stay for the small group afterwards.

    Now, this is the biggee. What if I ask my family to give me random drug testing?


    Nothing wrong with having someone hold you accountable, I think it’s a good idea.
    Do you want your family to be the ones to do it? For me, I needed to work with my therapist, she’s the only one I could really be honest with about what was going on when I finally came clean to her that is.

    First….i don’t know how to stop and this, to me, seems like it may force me to stop.


    That wouldn’t stop me, if I wasn’t ready, I would find a way. And that would put them in a bad position, and they wouldn’t know how to deal w/it. But that’s just me.
    Even if I was ready, I remember when a close friend of mine accused me of using when I wasn’t, that was tough…. You may have to deal with that.. The closer you are to people when they accuse you of stuff like that the harder it is, and if you ask them to hold you accountable, they may do that.
    Those are things I would think about anyway.

    Second…..can you tell me where to find such kits and the cost (i know i could call the drug store, but i’d rather get my info from you guys)

    Will there be a kit that just test for alcohol and cocaine?


    I only know of the blow test for alcohol in car places, but in drug stores, they have amphetamine kits for under $20.00, also look up online things that can make them test positive.

    Since i’ve used recently, i’d like to start off clean, so how long does it take for cocaine and alcohol to get out of my system?

    Okay….this is the part that troubles me: Oh God……this leave no room for relapse. I could relapse but it would certainly be out in the open and not hidden due to the testing. Which means…..if i was to fail the test……i don’t know what would happen to me.

    I keep hearing relapse is part of recovery, but it really can’t be with me and this drug testing is holding my feet to the fire.


    I never heard that until I came here, for me I don’t think like that. I understand it for others and why they do, but if I did, it would seal my casket. There is no room for me to use, no matter what, I just don’t. It’s not an option for me, ever…

    So…..will you guy answer all the above questions and give me your input?

    Thanks.

    :bbj:
    (JMHO)

    GOOD LUCK!! YOU CAN DO IT, JUST BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, AND YOU CAN DO IT. :Val004:

    #164584
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I keep hearing relapse is part of recovery

    I have not had a drink since I found solid recovery.
    So I consider relapse is part of the disease…not recovery.

    I have no clue about drug testing…
    only had it done to me in a lab for job clearances.

    Blessings

    #164588
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Sounds rough,,,the whole UA thing..there is a easier way..
    It is not easy for me to day..but honey..you have to WANT to quit..
    My best made plans while using always blew up in my face.
    MY BEST THINKING got me here…I mean if it works for you its great and god knows I hope you can make a plan that works..its all I can do to make it to the meetings…and that alone is keeping me clean today…
    I really feel for you..i have felt the same desperation while using and not being able to stop…

    Just don’t die and you’ll make it!!
    love north

    #164599
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    northbelle…just don’t die and I’ll make it!! what kind of life is that?

    I do want to be the mother i should be, the wife, the friend…etc….but recovery is eluding me.

    i’m trying to put all the consquences in place to stop me from using…….do you think that won’t work, because i don’t want it yet?

    if that is the case, then i just need to go out and do it up good…..rip it up……force myself to get to some point that i want to recover.

    does that make any sense?

    i am trying to use my head and do smart things but right now it seems like there is no good answer……i’ve lost either way.

    #164589
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Sorry..didn’t mean to sound trite or anything..
    I have just known so many addicts that have od’d and don’t have any kind of Chance..
    I remember once coming out of a od in the emergency room…they picked me up and gave me narcon,,,which brings you out of a heroin od..
    The nurse was asking me questions…I told her I was a vegetarian..
    I swear this gal about fell out laughing,,”She said,,,Your lying here dying of drug addiction ..telling me you don’t eat meat…amazing”. I didn’t eat at all at the time!
    Sorry to hijack you thread..

    No I don’t think you have to go out and rip it up…BUT sometimes we DO have to get pretty miserable….
    I wish I had some suggestions. I really care about you…probably because when you talk ,you are talking about ME…I am very much like you….just a few months ago I was right where you are at. Couldn’t stop but had too much info on addiction to enjoy it anymore..
    NOTHING sucks more than getting high and thinking about RECOVERY!!! That is what I always did …
    keep posting sweet thing..
    love north

    #164594
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I’m not sure the whole testing/accountability thing will work in the long term. If you want to use, you will. I would instead go to a LOT more meetings and talk about your urges there.

    #164598
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I agree with Mike. NO testing would have stopped me. I had to really want to quit. thank God I finally got ready. LOTS of meetings were the answer for me.

    #164596
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    There’s a part in the BB that talks about sending us to Greenland before we are ready to stop but that we would somehow find an eskimo with Whiskey at home. I can’t remember exactly the words but the 12 steps are so powerful we don’t need extra insuramce. You can’t get more insured than in the hands of your HP

    If you get step one down and some time up clean and sober doing the steps with a sponsor, I don’t think you will need more than that in your toolkit.

    #164600
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    i really don’t know how to handle it.

    perhaps the drug testing is not a good ideal…..i’d probably find ways around it.

    i swear, what makes me so different than othes on this site? all of you want recovery…..and when you relapse….it’s okay….just get back up and try again.

    i just don’t think that way……there is no room for failure for me. i’m trying to force something that’s not yet arrived. i know deep down that i’m just another addict and really AM just like the rest of you, i guess i’ve not hit my rock bottom yet.

    but my family doesn’t deserve to be hurt again….i know that and they do to. i’ll lose them…..when i fail……i will lose them and i’d rather die.

    it just seems very hopeless right now.

    it boils down to choices…..that’s what i tell myself, yet then i remember, hey, this is a disease and if i had cancer and it came back, my family would not leave me, but addiction is different.

    i agree…..i am powerless and the only way is through my higher power, yet it seems as though my higher power can’t prevent a relapse!

    thanks for all the input.

    #164595
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I’m not sure the whole testing/accountability thing will work in the long term. If you want to use, you will. I would instead go to a LOT more meetings and talk about your urges there

    .

    I totally agree. It says in the NA Basic Text that an addict can be counseled, reasoned with, prayed over, threatened, beaten, jailed…etc., but will not stop using until they are ready to stop. That certainly was my personal experience. I tried for so long to figure out a way to stop using and to rationalize a “program” suitable to what I was willing to do (at that time), but time and time again I found myself using.

    I entered numerous rehabs and outpatient programs and “successfully completed” them all – only taking the suggestions I felt were appropriate for me – and many times I was able to stay clean for brief periods (thinking I was okay). I even had a counselor tell me that I suffered from “Analysis Paralysis.” He said that I always thought my way in and thought my way out, but ultimately I’d think my way into doing nothing about recovery. He told me that recovery was about action, and once I put some action into my recovery I might be able to stay clean. Man…was he so right. I’ve since learned that recovery isn’t about thinking my way into a new way of living, but more about living my way into a new way of thinking.

    How desperate I was in the end determined how willing I was to follow direction. My thinking and my way didn’t work. I had to get honest and admit that I didn’t have the slightest clue on how to recover, so how could I make up my own program? Why kid myself? Any formula I created, I could defeat or manipulate. I had to do what worked for others and do it just like they did. I was told to do 90 meetings in 90 days: I went to 2 or 3 meetings a day because I wanted it that bad. They told me to get a Basic Text and read it: I read a chapter every day. They told me to join a homegroup and get involved in service: I did that too. They told me to get a sponsor and a support network: I got a sponsor and plenty of phone numbers. I reached out for help. They told me to work the steps because the steps were the solution: I got busy doing step work. They told me to change people, places & things and don’t use NO MATTER WHAT!! I stopped hanging around people who drank or did drugs. I lost or threw away dealers phone numbers. I had my phone number changed and didn’t give it to people who used. When I had the urge to get high, I called someone in recovery or went to another meeting and shared about how I was struggling. At first…it wasn’t easy, but nothing worth having ever is. When I surrendered and followed directions of a program that was already proven, my recovery began.

    i swear, what makes me so different than othes on this site? all of you want recovery…..and when you relapse….it’s okay….just get back up and try again.

    I don’t believe you’re different and it’s NOT okay to relapse. Relapse never happens by accident…it happens by choice. And it is my personal view that a few days clean followed by using isn’t a relapse – it’s a pause and a continuation. One of the reasons I believe no one gets beat up about their relapse is because we know it can and does happen. We accept it because it’s reality, but not because we like it or because we condone it. NA tells us that a relapse can be the “jarring experience” that brings about a more rigorous application of the program – meaning, instead of sidestepping certain directions, we make sure we do it the next time.

    i agree…..i am powerless and the only way is through my higher power, yet it seems as though my higher power can’t prevent a relapse!

    God (or Higher Power) doesn’t remove self-will, and since a relapse is the result of a conscious decision to use, self-will brings about the relapse. Although we aren’t responsible for our disease, we are totally responsible for our recovery. In the rooms we hear members share that God does for us what we cannot (not, will not)do for ourselves. The hit is that WE CAN recover and recovery is within our grasp.

    The question now is: what are you willing to do to recover? And if you’re not willing to follow direction, why not?

    If we can do it…so can you.

    #164591
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Seriously, I found a sponsor and did exactly what I was told. Darned if that didn’t keep me sober.

    Every other time I tried to do it my way I ended up using again.

    I made promises after promises and broke them every time, until I worked my program.

    My prayers are with you, I know it is difficult.

    #164587
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    As far as drug testing, please do not involved underage children in holding you accountable. They are not emotionally equipped to deal with that.

    I am partial to 12 step programs because I know they work for people who do the 12 steps. I have known a lot of newcomers drop out and say it didn’t work for them, but i personally have NEVER known anyone who took all 12 steps and LIVED them that said the program didn’t work. But, I dont’ know if you’re just attending a meeting per week or if you plan to follow the program. If not, here’s one crucial element I see lacking from what you wrote: You didn’t mention key relapse factors and what you’re doing to cope with relapse triggers. For instance, when you get into a major fight with your boss, you are seeing red and wanting to get drunk, what is going to stop you? If your program of choice is teaching you how to cope with anger so that you don’t want a drink/drug, that’s great. But if you’re program does not adequately teach you how to cope with problems in every day living, you’ll still not know any other way to cope. Make sense?

    #164592
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I would say Keep it Simple. Go to meetings, meetings, meetings. I agree with Daydream. I have young children and they know mommy gets sick sometimes, but that’s all. Just don’t make your recovery harder than it has to be. It’s hard enough as it is!

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