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- March 27, 2016 at 6:21 pm#38901AnonymousInactive
Wednesday marked eight months without any alcohol. Each and every day of those eight months I reinforced my strong commitment to myself to never, ever touch a drop again. Yesterday’s lay-off came as a total shock. And, no, my first thoughts weren’t of drinking- my mind was far from it. However, as my thoughts progressed, alcohol did come to mind. Strangely, it was like a voice telling me that I have the perfect excuse to just go ahead and grab a bottle of vodka- “no one’s going to blame you.” Then, another, much bigger and stronger voice emphatically said “NO FREAKIN’ WAY- DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!” Honestly, the thought of downing any amount of alcohol was not appealing at all, in fact, it was repulsive. And then my strong voice of reason made for extra reinforcement. My thoughts never went back to alcohol the rest of the day. Even today, alcohol did not come to mind until I decided to come onto 12 Step National Meetings and write. And, I’m so happy with myself that I didn’t cave in in the least because I know how crappy I’d be feeling now, probably moreso emotionally, and that I’d be starting on another bottle very soon if not already. And then again tomorrow, and so on. Wow…
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