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  • #34099

    Today is my last day in intensive outpatient treatment, and this is the second time I have done it in a year.My recovery team decided that it was best for me to start from scratch, and give recovery my full attention.One of the conditions is that I make no lifestyle changes for atleast 90 days(new job,or anything that will be a change to my schedule).
    Since starting Sub, I moved twice, got married, had a miscarriage, and changed careers.It was as if I was too busy to give my recovery first priority, and I agree with the decision of my program completely.It isn’t to discredit all I have done this past year, just do it more in depth.Being an addict, when life gets dull, I have this need to fill my life with new exciting ideas and demands, and it is a threat to my recovery.I took the time to read the AA/NA texts and it even brings up what I did in the books.
    I drank alcohol at my wedding, and a handful of other times as well.Even though alcohol is not a problem for me, the thought process is.I believe by telling myself it was OK to drink, I started a chain of thinking that would have led to a full blown relapse.The honesty with myself in my decision to change is of highest importance.How can I expect to live honestly if I am lying to myself, or telling half truths?
    The most important thing to me is that I did not give up.I made mistakes, but I jumped right back into recovery, which in the past would have never happened.I decided to make goals for myself daily in regards to my recovery.Keeping it simple will help me a great deal.

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